When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said,
I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed
the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I
was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and
shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She
was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage.
But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to
Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she
could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten
years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted
time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved
Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had
expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of
divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer
now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the
table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast
because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so
I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything
from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in
that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her
reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want
to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how
I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our
bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to
make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought
it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce,
she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both
appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms.
His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then
to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes
and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling
somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I
could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this
woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There
were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its
toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning.
This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing
again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month
slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but
could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown
bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why
I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.
Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him,
seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his
life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I
turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last
minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the
sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally.
I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my
arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly
and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I
was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane
opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce
anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever?
She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My
marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of
our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that
since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her
until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the
door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The
salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you
out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up
stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even
notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the
whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the
divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is
not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an
environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So
find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other
that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to
success when they gave up and for those of us not married, we can learn the art of sticking together with your relationship partner despite the odds. You are both stronger than the odds only when you agree.
A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.
So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined
together, let not man separate.
Hi, this isnt my own piece. I did not write this..no one knows the original source, it was fowarded to my mail bt all I know is that this is a blessing that needs to spread round like wild fire!
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Dating and marriage is different than it was twenty years ago. In today's society, more than 50% of all marriages fail for one reason or another. Just thinking about that makes "commitment" seem scary. It seems that when relationships are faced with challenges, people quit trying.
Dating is more like a marathon, trying to date as many people as possible, instead of taking time to get to know someone at a deeper level. For married couples, divorce is not biased. Whether married for thirty years or eight months, the outcome can be the same.
The fact is that relationships, whether dating or married, are hard. Things do not always go perfectly, fighting does occur, and it takes a 100% commitment from both parties to make it a success. Often when people break off a relationship, they feel as though something is missing. The "spark" has gone, leaving one or both people feeling inadequate and unfulfilled.
However, even though the odds are not very good, healthy, and long-lasting relationships are definitely possible and proven by many people.
Look at Paul Newman and Joanne Woodard, Danny Devito and Rhea Perlman, or Nancy and Ronald Regan. What secrets do they possess? The answer is that they all work hard at their relationship. They made a decision of choosing to love their mate rather than relying on the "warm and fuzzy" feelings, which everyone knows will fade.
By making love a choice you are making a decision that even in the bad times, you stick it out.
Think of it like choosing a car. You pick out the make, model, year, color, and features that you believe are best for you. After driving your car for a couple of months, you realize that perhaps you should have purchased a larger car, or that maybe the leather seats would have been better, or on hot sunny days, the sunroof would have been nice. However, it is now too late so you choose to keep your car and make it work.
It is the same for marriage. Not everything will be perfect and there will be major obstacles to overcome but you have made your decision and now you choose to make it work.
There are hundreds of things you can do to better your relationship.
To help get you headed in the right direction, we have chosen 101 ways to build, strengthen, and enhance your relationship.
Remember, little steps taken every day will add up to big successes.
Dating is more like a marathon, trying to date as many people as possible, instead of taking time to get to know someone at a deeper level. For married couples, divorce is not biased. Whether married for thirty years or eight months, the outcome can be the same.
The fact is that relationships, whether dating or married, are hard. Things do not always go perfectly, fighting does occur, and it takes a 100% commitment from both parties to make it a success. Often when people break off a relationship, they feel as though something is missing. The "spark" has gone, leaving one or both people feeling inadequate and unfulfilled.
However, even though the odds are not very good, healthy, and long-lasting relationships are definitely possible and proven by many people.
Look at Paul Newman and Joanne Woodard, Danny Devito and Rhea Perlman, or Nancy and Ronald Regan. What secrets do they possess? The answer is that they all work hard at their relationship. They made a decision of choosing to love their mate rather than relying on the "warm and fuzzy" feelings, which everyone knows will fade.
By making love a choice you are making a decision that even in the bad times, you stick it out.
Think of it like choosing a car. You pick out the make, model, year, color, and features that you believe are best for you. After driving your car for a couple of months, you realize that perhaps you should have purchased a larger car, or that maybe the leather seats would have been better, or on hot sunny days, the sunroof would have been nice. However, it is now too late so you choose to keep your car and make it work.
It is the same for marriage. Not everything will be perfect and there will be major obstacles to overcome but you have made your decision and now you choose to make it work.
There are hundreds of things you can do to better your relationship.
To help get you headed in the right direction, we have chosen 101 ways to build, strengthen, and enhance your relationship.
Remember, little steps taken every day will add up to big successes.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
OVER SABI
Men NEVER listen!!!!!
Nice one, enjoy!
A man and his wife received a letter from their daughter who went to study overseas:
My beloved Parents, I miss you so much. I don't know when I'm coming home, but it seems not anytime soon. It breaks my heart to think that by the time I get back you'll be too old. So enclosed you will find a bottle of a potion I have invented. It will make you young, so when I return you'll be the same age as I left you. NOTE: " Please take only one drop"
NOTE: "Please take only one drop"
So they opened the envelope and in it there is a bottle with a red potion..
The husband looks at the wife and says: "You go first."
So the wife opens the bottle and takes a drop, there after the husband follows. Indeed they do turn 5 years younger.
A year passes and the daughter returns home to find her mother young and beautiful, carrying a baby on her back.
The mother proceeds to tell her daughter how the potion worked and made her look young.
The daughter is delighted and asks about her father.
"Your father, my child, got so jealous that I was young and beautiful so he drank the whole bottle."
"So where is he?"
"Oh, that's him I have on my back."
Nice one, enjoy!
A man and his wife received a letter from their daughter who went to study overseas:
My beloved Parents, I miss you so much. I don't know when I'm coming home, but it seems not anytime soon. It breaks my heart to think that by the time I get back you'll be too old. So enclosed you will find a bottle of a potion I have invented. It will make you young, so when I return you'll be the same age as I left you. NOTE: " Please take only one drop"
NOTE: "Please take only one drop"
So they opened the envelope and in it there is a bottle with a red potion..
The husband looks at the wife and says: "You go first."
So the wife opens the bottle and takes a drop, there after the husband follows. Indeed they do turn 5 years younger.
A year passes and the daughter returns home to find her mother young and beautiful, carrying a baby on her back.
The mother proceeds to tell her daughter how the potion worked and made her look young.
The daughter is delighted and asks about her father.
"Your father, my child, got so jealous that I was young and beautiful so he drank the whole bottle."
"So where is he?"
"Oh, that's him I have on my back."
Sunday, August 1, 2010
True luv...
True Love Means
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot...
..who calls you back when you hang up on him...
..who will stay awake just to watch you sleep...
..wait for the guy who kisses your forehead...
..who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats...
..who holds your hand in front of his friends...
..wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how
much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you...
..wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her, or that's him"...
If you open this, you have to repost it so that you'll be showered with only love for the rest of your life.
This midnight, true love will knock on your heart and something good
will happen to you at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow. It could happen anywhere. So get ready for the biggest shock of your life.
Please don't break this chain. Let love shower unto us for all the time. Send this e-mail to as many people as you can and see what great power and magic love can bring.
Just think about it
There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She
hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always
there for her. She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see
the world, I will marry you.'
One day,
someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages
came off, she was able to see everything, including her
boyfriend.
He asked
her,'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?' The
girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The
sight of his closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn't expected
that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life
led her to refuse to marry him.
Her
boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her
saying: 'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for be fore
they were yours, they were mine.'
This is
how the human brain often works when our status changes.
Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who
was always by their side in the most painful situations.
Life Is a
Gift
Today
before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't
speak.
Before
you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone
who has nothing to eat.
Before
you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone
who's crying out to GOD for a companion.
Today
before you complain about life - Think of someone who died
too early on this earth.
Before
you complain about your children - Think of someone who
desires children but they're barren.
Before
you argue about your dirty house someone didn't clean or
sweep - Think of the people who are living in the streets.
Before
whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who
walks the same distance with their feet.
And when
you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the
unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your
job.
But
before you think of pointing the finger or condemning
another - Remember that not one of us is without sin.
And when
depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on
your face and think: you're alive and still
around.
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot...
..who calls you back when you hang up on him...
..who will stay awake just to watch you sleep...
..wait for the guy who kisses your forehead...
..who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats...
..who holds your hand in front of his friends...
..wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how
much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you...
..wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her, or that's him"...
If you open this, you have to repost it so that you'll be showered with only love for the rest of your life.
This midnight, true love will knock on your heart and something good
will happen to you at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow. It could happen anywhere. So get ready for the biggest shock of your life.
Please don't break this chain. Let love shower unto us for all the time. Send this e-mail to as many people as you can and see what great power and magic love can bring.
Just think about it
There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She
hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always
there for her. She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see
the world, I will marry you.'
One day,
someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages
came off, she was able to see everything, including her
boyfriend.
He asked
her,'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?' The
girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The
sight of his closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn't expected
that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life
led her to refuse to marry him.
Her
boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her
saying: 'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for be fore
they were yours, they were mine.'
This is
how the human brain often works when our status changes.
Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who
was always by their side in the most painful situations.
Life Is a
Gift
Today
before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't
speak.
Before
you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone
who has nothing to eat.
Before
you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone
who's crying out to GOD for a companion.
Today
before you complain about life - Think of someone who died
too early on this earth.
Before
you complain about your children - Think of someone who
desires children but they're barren.
Before
you argue about your dirty house someone didn't clean or
sweep - Think of the people who are living in the streets.
Before
whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who
walks the same distance with their feet.
And when
you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the
unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your
job.
But
before you think of pointing the finger or condemning
another - Remember that not one of us is without sin.
And when
depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on
your face and think: you're alive and still
around.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
marriage humour
Husbands are husbands
A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan.
'What was that for?' the man asked.
The wife replied 'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket'.
The man then said 'When I was at the races last week Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on'
The wife apologized and went on with the housework.
Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious. Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit again.
Wife replied: 'Your Horse phoned!!! '
A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan.
'What was that for?' the man asked.
The wife replied 'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket'.
The man then said 'When I was at the races last week Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on'
The wife apologized and went on with the housework.
Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious. Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit again.
Wife replied: 'Your Horse phoned!!! '
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Igala Singles Network: aw romantic re u?
Igala Singles Network: aw romantic re u?: "Baba Stephen Igala girls said that we igala guys are not romantic abi... IGALA GIRLS, how romantic re u? prove urselves here..."
Monday, June 28, 2010
IGALA GUYS LACK THE USE OF ROMANTIC WORDS
Why do igala guys always find it difficult to use romantic words,even the educated ones feel some how about it not to talk of the illiterates.
aw romantic re u?
Igala girls said that we igala guys are not romantic abi... IGALA GIRLS, how romantic re u? prove urselves here...
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